5 Things Everyone Who Cares About Kids Should Know About Their Brains

Key Insights from Neuroscientist Dr. Melina Uncapher

When Dr. Melina Uncapher looks at the brain, she sees an organ constantly at work, learning and evolving. “Your brain is learning every second of every day,” she says with a tone of reverence. “Even when you’re sleeping, your brain is processing and sorting through the events of the day, deciding what’s important to keep and what’s okay to forget.”

Melina, founder and CEO of SETA-ED and a former professor with labs at Stanford and UC San Francisco, first became fascinated by the brain at the age of 13, during a time when her grandmother, Shirley, was her only source of emotional support and warmth. When Shirley began showing signs of dementia, Melina watched the very essence of who she was start to fade away. Over the next three years, Melina experienced the painful unraveling of her grandmother’s memory and sense of self. When Shirley passed away, Melina’s commitment to studying the brain and understanding how it shapes who we are was sparked, ultimately becoming the driving force behind Melina’s lifework.

As Melina reflects, “She showed me that we are both constrained and amplified by our biology, specifically our brain biology.” Today, as a scientist and educator, Melina has taught her “Science of Learning” bootcamp to over 50,000 educators, policymakers, and students around the world. She’s even reached every head of school in New Zealand, helping educators understand the profound ways the brain influences how we learn and show up in the world.

Melina’s work focuses on how the brain functions and how it impacts our learning, memory, and behavior. What makes her science so credible to scientists but accessible to educators and laypeople is her mixing of hardcore science with practical, real-life applications, making visible how our experiences literally change the brain. As but one example, in 2012, she partnered with a filmmaker to design a competition to use brain scans to measure how love expresses itself through the brain. Participants concentrated their love as intensely as they could while an fMRI brain scanner monitored their brain activity. (It’s the second-place winner that will make you cry, I promise.) Over the course of a rich conversation, she shared the essential insights every person should know about their own brains – and every educator and parent should know about their children’s.

The Power of Attention

Melina’s research reveals that our brain isn’t just passively recording experiences—it actively constructs a coherent story of our lives, processing events while we’re awake and even while we sleep. From the hippocampus, a crucial memory hub, to the vast neural networks in our cortex, the brain continuously forms new connections. It’s not just the “what” of our experiences that matters, but the way we pay attention to them. “Whatever you’re paying attention to,” Melina explains, “that’s the gain multiplier for activity in that part of your brain.” This means that every interaction, every conversation, and every moment of focus is an opportunity for our brain to grow, adapt, and reorganize itself.

Brains Are Wired for Possibility & Connection – Especially in Children

But the brain isn’t just a machine for remembering facts; it’s a tool for connection and transformation. One could actually say, from a neurological perspective, that memory is connection. “When we are born, almost every part of the brain is connected to almost every other part. We process our experiences throughout the brain–for instance, your visual cortex in the back of your brain is allowing you to see these words, but another network in the temporal lobes is allowing you to understand what these words mean. Memory isn’t stored in a specific area of the brain. Learning happens when separate brain regions become more strongly connected.” In fact, a recent breakthrough from the International Brain Laboratory, a collaboration of 19 laboratories supported by the Simons Foundation, found that decision processes occur across many parts of the brain simultaneously and aren’t siloed in separate structures, as was previously hypothesized.

One of Melina’s most profound insights is about children’s brains: they come pre-equipped with the ability to learn and adapt, regardless of the environment they are born into. “We are wired for possibility,” she says, as early as when we first enter the world. Because children’s brains are optimized for growth, “it’s our role to create environments that help them thrive,” she explains. If there’s one thing Melina wants everyone to know about the children in their lives, this is it: “Kids are born with all the assets they need, and more.”

The Aging Brain Is Uniquely Beautiful

While the brain’s ability to store and recall information is remarkable, Melina argues that forgetting is just as crucial to learning. “We seem to have a primacy in our culture that people who are better at remembering are smarter.” Melina disagrees, speaking with reverence about the aging brain.

As we grow older, our brain shifts priorities from the accumulation of details to a more refined understanding of patterns. “This is one of the reasons why our brains are so good at recognizing patterns as we get older,” she explains. “We’re optimizing for the bigger picture, rather than getting lost in the details.” This shift is not a sign of decline but rather a maturation process that leads to wisdom—the kind of knowledge that has kept human societies thriving for millennia.

Brain Awareness Week

This interview comes at the perfect time. Brain Awareness Week—observed from March 10-16, 2025—is dedicated to raising awareness about brain health and neuroscience research. Melina’s work is a powerful reminder that the brain is not just an organ but a dynamic force, constantly learning, adapting, and connecting. “The brain controls every heartbeat, every breath, every thought,” she says, and it’s in these connections—between neurons, between experiences, and between people—that true learning happens. Whether we’re kids wired for possibility or adults navigating the patterns of life, our brains are always at work, reshaping themselves in response to what we encounter. For those of us who care about children’s development, the key isn’t simply filling their brains with information—it’s about creating environments where their brains can connect, learn, and thrive. And as we grow older, this process doesn’t stop; instead, our brains continue to prioritize what matters, shifting from details to wisdom. If we truly understand the brain’s power to adapt and change, we can create spaces that allow every child—and every adult—to realize their full potential.

5 Things Everyone Who Cares About Kids Should Know About the Developing Brain

1. The Brain is Always Learning: From the moment we’re born, our brains are constantly processing, learning from and optimizing the world around us. Kids’ brains are especially adaptable, wired to learn from every experience and interaction. “Kids are born with all the assets they need, and more,” Melina says, emphasizing the importance of creating rich, supportive environments to foster their development.
2. Sleep is Essential for Learning and Memory: Our brains are not just passive during sleep; they are actively consolidating memories and sorting through information to determine what’s important to retain. “Sleep is so important,” Melina explains. “It’s why dreams are so important – it’s ‘hippocampal replay,’ the process of sorting our experiences from the day into what should be stored or cached from memory.” For children, ensuring they get enough quality sleep is critical for both short-term learning and long-term brain health. And bonus for adults: The better our sleep, the lower our chance of dementia as we age.
3. The Brain Prioritizes What It Needs to Remember: Forgetting is an essential part of learning. The brain needs to decide what to keep and what to discard in order to stay efficient.
4. Children’s Brains Are Wired for Possibility: From birth, children’s brains are primed to adapt to their environment, learning and growing with each new experience. Melina emphasizes, “We are wired for possibility,” and that potential can be cultivated by providing children with the right opportunities to learn, explore, and engage with the world around them.
5. The Teenage Brain is Designed for Exploration: Teens are in a unique phase of brain development. Their brains are wired to seek new experiences and take risks, which is vital for learning and growth (and survival of the species, historically). However, this also means they may not always exhibit self-control, particularly in social situations. Understanding this developmental phase can help parents and educators offer more empathetic guidance.

Leading educators from the Beyond100K network curated resources and experiences to bring brain science to every child and every classroom:

• Science Friday is hosting a Hack Your Brain Week. They have developed activities and lessons (predominantly for students age 10-14) to learn more about the brain.
• PhET offers middle and high school lessons and simulations on neural activity here.
• LabXchange has a learning suite of neuroscience videos and lessons here. You can watch their videos here, as well.
• KQED shared an NPR episode: 9 Unexpected Things We Learned About Mental Health and Our Brains in 2024.