Everyone has their preferred stadium snacks and we could all assemble our own list of which foods reign supreme and all of them would be correct … except for Denver Broncos QB Bo Nix because somehow he managed to get this wrong.
Nix joined the fellas from The Bread Basket podcast on their TikTok page to take part in a stadium foods draft.
Simple task here. You draft a top 5 stadium foods roster with Nix picking and then the Bread Basket guys picking and so on and so forth.
How could anyone mess this up?
Well, Bo — who to his credit took this very seriously; note the pen — managed to do this.
Egd, man… let’s work through this together like some kind of group therapy session…
No. 1 Popcorn
Nix mentioned that this was his first time GM-ing and that was obvious when he took popcorn out of the gate.
Look, I like popcorn, but that’s a food that you save until at least the third round. At least.
It has a ceiling. There’s only popcorn and bad popcorn. There’s no such thing as, “Oh my god, you need to try this popcorn” popcorn.
I’ve tried to explain this to Boy Scouts parked outside of my local grocery store (which sells popcorn, by the way), but I’ve been asked to please stop because I was, “making a scene” and they were “only kids.”
Sorry for introducing them to reality; someone has to.
Anyway, the big error here was that Nix allowed the hosts to take a proper stadium food first-rounder: the hot dog.
No. 2 Dippin’ Dots
Well, nowhere to go but up right?
Wrong; with his No.2 pick, Nix took Dippin’ Dots, which, sorry if you’re a fan, are total garbage.
Maybe the “ice cream of the future” was cool a few decades ago, but now we should all be aware that they’re just an inferior form of ice cream.
In fact, I don’t even think Dippin’ Dots would crack my top 5 “Frozen Dairy Stadium Treats” list.
This oversight allowed the hosts — who have clearly done a few of these drafts — to take beer.
There’s a case to be made that that’s not a “stadium food,” but it’s a great pick as opposed to Nix’s first two picks which make me think he may have misunderstood the assignment and was planning the menu for a 7-year-old’s birthday part.
C’mon, Bo; I’m rooting for you. Redeem yourself!
No. 3 Pretzel
There we go! Bo is in business!
I love a pretzel and as Nix noted, getting it in the third round is a steal.
Now I wonder if he’s going cheese or mustard. I I have to pick one I usually go mustard but If I can get my mitts on both I like to go all choose-your-own-adventure on a pretzel and mix it up.
No. 4. Frozen Lemonade
Alright, Bo, you sweet bastard, as our own Ricky Cobb would say; you’ve won me back.
After the hosts took nachos, Bo took frozen lemonade, which is a personal favorite of mine and maybe the most underrated stadium food.
True story: I was at the Grand Prix of St. Petersburg the other week and grabbed a frozen lemonade and it was phenomenal just like I knew it would be.
How did I know? Because the guy selling it was scooping it out of an old Igloo cooler after chopping it by hand.
Real ones know that that’s the good stuff, and I don’t want to speak for Bo, but I bet he’d agree.
Alright, let’s finish strong…
No. 5. Coke (The Soda Kind)
After a misstep from the hosts with pizza — not a great stadium food in my opinion; something Bo called out — Bo came back down to Earth a little bit by closing out his draft with Coke.
I like a Coke (I actually prefer Coke Zero; not because I’m working on my summer bod; I like the taste better) but there were some better avenues to explore with the No. 5 pick.
Like, I know Dippin’ Dots are already on the list, but how was ice cream served in a batting helmet not explored? Or peanuts? Or chicken tenders? Cheeseburger?!
Coke was a safe pick, but it was better than the hosts’ final pick: cotton candy.
…
Man what an ugly start to that draft, but I’ve got to say I was impressed by what I saw in the later rounds from a first time stadium foods GM.
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